When are people most alone

When they are spiritually alone
why? because they have no supporters. What i mean by spiritually alone is not that they are in a new environment, is that they don't feel connected at all. When you move into a new environment, there are infinite possibilities as to who will be your friend. However, after a time and you have no friends or companion, you will be truly alone. leaving school alone, having dinner or lunch alone, unable to enjoy activity with friends. That is what i call truly alone for me.
Some people could live alone without companionship, but i can't, not in a million years. I have felt truly alone before, it was a few years back when my friends betrayed me and turn on me. When that happened, i had no one to turn to and no one to go to. My other friends are in another school and the current school, i was friendless. I dwell into a state of lonership and even bullies suddenly came creeping up behind me. I was blackmailed and threatened during middle school. No friend came and my mom couldn't do anything about it.
What happen then? i snapped
that one day when 3 guys crept up behind me demanding me to do some stupid ass shit again, i snapped and i lunged myself on top of them. i got a few punches and kicks on me but i didn't care. I had enough and i went raging. The three guys were bleeding afterwards and they ran off. They never came back again and the story spread throughout middle school. No one messed with me anymore but i was still in a state of weird angry nerd isolation. That was a real hard year for me until finally the wave of fear or something past. Then i had a few friends for a while before i went back to Taipei.
I know what true lonely meant and how scary it was. I often walked in the night alone and rethink the moments during my sort of social exile. That wasn't fun at all, it was depressing and sad without any piers with you and play with you. I had no friends, i was wimpy but in the same time scary for the wimpy kids. I fear that time of bully, desolation, loneliness and fear would arise again. Therefore i improve my image, my class, almost everything to make myself suitable for social standards. loneliness really is the greatest fear in my heart.